Please, Doctor, how can I identify my goals, and what are the
most important goals in the life of a Muslim woman that she
should set for herself?
May Allah bless you and welcome the high aspirations. Truly, I am
delighted by such questions when they come from a girl who seeks the
best for herself.
First Goal: Prepare Yourself as a devoted servant of Allah
The Muslim woman defines her goals from the Book of Allah Almighty
and the Sunnah of His Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, from the verses of the Wise Remembrance (the Quran), and from every command and prohibition
in the Qur’an that is a goal for us to “to respond to with determination
and certainty”. In short, it is adhering to the path of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and the way of the believers. Thus, your first and foremost goal is to be
upright as commanded by Allah “So remain steadfast as you have been
commanded” (Quran 11:112).
Uprightness, as commanded by Allah Almighty, means steadfastness on
the guidance of the Qur’an and the Sunnah with the understanding of
the Prophet’s companions (عنهم هللا رضي(, the bearers of trust and the
conveyors of the complete message from the Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وسلم, untouched by innovations and deviations. It involves adhering to His command entirely, without negligence or excess, as He says (So remain
steadfast as you have been commanded, and those who have turned back with you [to Allah] and do not transgress. Indeed, He is Seeing of what
you do (Quran 11:112). And do not incline toward those who do wrong,
lest you be touched by the Fire, and you would not have other than Allah
any protectors; then you would not be helped (Quran 11:113).
This requires you to acquire knowledge of your religion and a framework
of understanding to worship Allah Almighty with enlightenment and
insight. Therefore, I advise you to begin with a concise religious course
that covers all the basics of the faith. This includes essential knowledge
of creed (‘Aqidah), such as understanding Allah’s names and attributes,
the pillars of Islam and faith, the nullifiers of the faith, the principles of
monotheism, its obligations, and prohibitions. Also, a foundation of
jurisprudence (Fiqh) in the acts of worship that are obligatory for you
and in which you strive to attain a higher status in paradise. This
encompasses the Fiqh of purity, prayer, fasting, and other worship,
including those related to the heart. Additionally, knowledge of the
sayings of the Messenger of Allah, صلى الله عليه وسلم, his biography, the lives of his wives (the Mothers of the Believers), the companions, and the female
companions. Also, understanding what is permissible and impermissible,
disliked, and recommended, and everything else that a Muslim woman
needs in her religion.
This threshold of knowledge is derived from the books of the Sunni
scholars, supported by evidence from the Quran and the Sunnah. At the
forefront of all these sciences is the knowledge of the Quran. I continue
to perceive the divine designation of mentioning the Quran in the context of command for the wives of the Prophet, صلى الله عليه وسلم, as a lesson for every Muslim woman in every time and place. There is a necessity to prioritize care for the Quran, as stated by Allah (And remember what is
recited in your houses of the verses of Allah and wisdom. Indeed, Allah
is ever subtle and acquainted).
So, read, contemplate, memorize, review, study, and pray with devotion
to Allah regarding the Quran!
I strongly advise you to delve into the works of Ibn al-Qayyim, رحمه الله,
as he addresses the soul, deals with heart issues, and his style is beautiful,
rich in benefits and treasures. I consider it an important guide for you
on this journey.
Additionally, I recommend delving into history to understand the human
movement and how the enemies of Allah and His Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم plot in every era to extinguish the light of Allah, allowing you to gain a precise understanding of the reality of the conflict between truth and falsehood, belief and disbelief, and the ongoing war between the party of Allah and the party of the accursed Satan.
All of this is part of the preparation to achieve the first goal. Preparation
for steadfastness, as commanded by Allah, involves acquiring the
necessary knowledge to understand how this steadfastness is achieved
and how to safeguard it from factors of deviation and regression.
Knowledge is for action. Once you acquire the necessary threshold of
knowledge to worship Allah with insight, the stage of striving begins.
Steadfastness is not merely a commitment; the path is fraught with risks,
obstacles, and enemies, foremost among them being Satan. Therefore,
vigilance, awareness, and attentiveness are your duties to reach your
ultimate goal: Allah’s acceptance, His satisfaction with you, a good
ending, and paradise, as Allah says (Say, “Indeed, my prayer, my rites of
sacrifice, my living, and my dying are for Allah, Lord of the worlds”).
Now that we have understood the first and most important goal in the
life of a Muslim girl, which is steadfastness as commanded by Allah and
worshiping Allah according to the path of the Prophet, صلى الله عليه وسلم, the other goals come sequentially.
Second Goal: Prepare Your Life According to Islam
In our time, preparing the life of a Muslim girl in accordance with the
teachings of Islam, its guidance, and objectives, is one of the most
important tasks. This task can be summarized as “a rebellion against the
ignorance of the era” (العصر جاهلية على التمرد(, to the extent of the vast
difference between our lives as intended by Allah through Islam and our
lives today, where we witness the marginalization of the laws of Allah
and the spread of wrongdoing, trials, and the Western dominance
imposed on us.
For this goal, you will find yourself at the heart of action as soon as you
declare your commitment to steadfastness, as commanded by Allah.
However, it requires a strong heart and exceptional preparation because
it is a time of alienation (Ghurbah). Alienation necessitates resilience in
the face of the challenges of steadfastness amid an environment that is
not only unsupportive but actively combats it. This involves eliminating
all hindrances and obstacles in your life that prevent you from competing
for the sake of Allah. This includes corrupt companionship, destructive
habits, inhibiting traits, sins, or transgressions that you may have
overlooked, and other factors that you are undoubtedly aware of. Your
goal should be to create the most suitable environment for continuity
and to eliminate as much as possible anything that hinders your journey
to paradise. Strive for everything that strengthens your heart and brings
out the best version of yourself. You are now an arrow launched,
knowing its direction, path, and the magnitude of the dangers it faces.
In this stage, you will become more aware of your own nature and more
capable of leading it towards what is beneficial for you in this world and
Third Goal: Prepare Yourself to Be a Devoted Wife and Mother
It is from the Sunnah of life that a woman goes through a phase where
she lives with her family and then a phase where she establishes her home
with her husband. Therefore, every girl must early on prepare for
establishing her family, which will serve as a miniature Islamic factory, a
school, and a building block of the nation. Her ambition should be to
establish this building block with Islam and for Islam.
This requires a considerable amount of knowledge, including the science
of marriage, the duties of a wife, the science of maintaining good
companionship with a husband as the head of the household, the art of
good manners, the science of motherhood, and the knowledge of raising
a generation firmly grounded in faith. It also involves the science of
managing a Muslim household and safeguarding it with an eye that fears
Allah. Reflect on the hadith narrated by Ibn Umar, may Allah be pleased
with them both, where the Prophet, صلى الله عليه وسلم, said: “Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The leader is a shepherd, and the man is a shepherd over his family, and the woman is a shepherd over her husband’s house and children. So, each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock.” (Agreed upon)
Taking care of your husband’s house and children is a science, an art,
and a responsibility. Early preparation for this is a duty. To acquire the
necessary knowledge, you can engage in beneficial reading, especially
from pure sources such as the Quran, Sunnah, and the practices of the
righteous predecessors (Salaf). Also, benefit from the experiences of
righteous individuals while staying away from Western ideologies and
innovations that may disturb and compromise your sound judgment.
If a Muslim woman entertains the hypothetical scenario of not achieving
the goal of becoming a wife, I say: marriage is destined, a provision, and
a test. Regardless of circumstances, it remains one of the primary goals
for every girl, no matter how she perceives herself or whether she feels
undesirable. These are provisions that Allah decrees, so ask Him with
confidence in His immense bounty and refrain from entertaining
doubtful thoughts! Maintain a positive outlook towards Allah, and do
not deprive yourself of supplication and seeking His guidance.
If Allah has not decreed marriage for you, then you are still a servant of
Allah in your family and society. Fulfill your duties as a daughter, sister,
aunt, cousin, neighbor, and nurturer for generations that have lost their
mothers and the responsible caretaker. Be in every position of a Muslim
woman that fills the gaps and mends the fractures, and this requires
understanding and piety towards Allah. Our entire lives are for Allah and
not for anyone else.
Fourth Goal: Contributing to the Process of Reform
The Muslim nation is currently experiencing an exceptional situation
marked by intellectual and moral weakness and backwardness.
Therefore, every Muslim, male and female, is obligated to contribute to
the forefront of reform to the best of their ability. This means enjoining
what is right, forbidding what is wrong, carrying the burden of restoring
governance according to the religion of Allah, supporting the oppressed
and the vulnerable, and not leaning towards the oppressors, even if the
protest is within one’s heart. This is a form of worship that many people
overlook, yet it is the essence of worship, if you truly understand. All
acts of worship lead to the attainment of piety, and complete piety is the
support of the religion of Allah.
Make it one of your goals in this world to establish the foundations of
Islam on the earth, even if it begins with a sincere call within your own
space of influence. Allah, the Almighty, says, “The believing men and
believing women are allies of one another. They enjoin what is right and
forbid what is wrong, establish prayer and give zakat, and obey Allah and
His Messenger. Those—Allah will have mercy upon them. Indeed, Allah
is Exalted in Might and Wise.” (Quran 9:71)
With the sincere and dedicated use of Allah’s guidance, you will find a
foothold, by the will of Allah, for supporting the religion of Allah.
Fifth Goal: Leaving an Impact and Legacy
One of the important goals that should occupy the Muslim girl is leaving
a positive impact, a good legacy, and striving for a good end. Life passes
swiftly, and the days almost go unnoticed in their speed. The successful
ones are those who leave a righteous impact behind them. The guidance
to achieve this is summarized in the saying of Allah: “And those who
strive for Us – We will surely guide them to Our ways. And indeed, Allah
is with the doers of good.” (Quran 29:69) In this verse, there is nothing
offered to you except your righteous deeds and sincerity with your
Creator. As much as you strive and turn to Allah, He opens doors of
victories for you that will amaze you.
I strongly advise you to maintain secrecy. Imam Shafi’i, هللا رحمه, said,
“Whoever wants Allah to open and illuminate his heart, he should
refrain from unnecessary speech, avoid sins, and have a hidden aspect
between him and Allah in his actions.”
Choose for yourself this hidden aspect, stick to it, keep it to yourself,
and sincerely dedicate it to Allah, the Almighty.
Sixth Goal: Your Noble Objectives
These are the goals that you distinguish yourself with, adorning them
with uniqueness and radiance. This means choosing magnificent
objectives to achieve, such as “memorizing the entire Quran” and striving
for the status of the people of the Quran, and “sponsoring an orphan”
while seeking the virtue mentioned in the Prophet’s hadith about
sponsoring an orphan (“I and the one who sponsors an orphan are like
these two in Paradise”), and other noble projects and goals. These
endeavors require continuous dedication and sincerity. It is you who will
choose these goals and exert the time and effort to achieve them, realizing
the great status you aspire to.
Rest assured that as you progress on the path of Allah, He, in His glory,
will open doors for you to the best deeds beyond what you may have
imagined. Therefore, these unique objectives will become clearer to you
as you advance in the journey of steadfastness.
Seventh Goal: Persistence and Preservation of Missed Opportunities
For every knight, there are setbacks, and every righteous man and woman
are susceptible to relapses and weaknesses. Therefore, educate yourself
on the strength of your goal, the strength of your effort, and the strength
of recovery. Only those who excel in recovery, compensating for their
losses, are motivated by the notion that “good deeds erase bad deeds.”
These goals constitute the project of your entire life. Preserving them is
safeguarding your happiness, peace of mind, and the tranquility of your
heart. Fear nothing, as the door is open for correction and competition.
Thanks be to Allah for the blessings of faith, steadfastness, and
repentance. Allah has thwarted the schemes of every defeated, hindered
devil, and the whisperings of the sneaky (shaytan).
These are the fundamental goals for every Muslim woman in her life,
and I find no better objectives, for their sum, if pursued, aligns with the
saying of Allah (He who does righteous deeds, whether male or female,
while being a believer, We will surely grant him a good life, and We will
surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of
what they used to do).
Do not burden yourself with worldly concerns after that. Success will
come to you effortlessly, and all worries will become trivial. Your major
concern will be the greatest matters, soaring in the realm of certainty and
If you occupy yourself with transient worldly goals, the ceiling of your
ambition will lower, and you will continue descending until you cling to
the ground. This is a significant loss, as taking flight again will be
Therefore, I’ve summarized for you the grand and most important goals.
Anything that leads to or revolves around them is within their orbit,
serving them. Preserve your nature as a woman and your faith as a
The greater your goals, the more your journey becomes blessed and
facilitated, challenged by the support of Allah and reliance on Him. All
other objectives become easy and insignificant. This is the essence of life.
Whoever lives it for Allah, He will support and guide them, while those
who live it for their own desires entrust themselves to those desires!
In the hadith: “Whoever makes the world his main concern, Allah will
disperse his affairs, place poverty before his eyes, and he will only get
from the world what was decreed for him. Whoever makes the Hereafter
his intention, Allah will gather his affairs, place contentment in his heart,
and the world will come to him willingly.” (Al-Silsilah Al-Sahihah)
Repeat every day: “O Living, O Sustaining, I seek help in Your mercy.
Set right for me all my affairs, and do not leave me to myself even for
the blink of an eye.”
“يا حي يا قيوم برحمتك أستغيث أصلح لي شأني كله وال تكلني إلى نفسي طرفة عين”
I also advise you to read the books “To You It Is” (إليك أنت)
and “The Cultivation of Ambition” (صناعة الهمة) and “Pages from the Notebook of Commitment” (صفحات من دفتر الالتزام) (and “The Reality of Death.” (حقيقة الموت)
Through them, your vision may become clearer, and you
can reap the benefits to the best extent.
May Allah grant you success and open for you a community devoted to
Allah, dignified by its faith and piety, and let the saying of Allah, the
Majestic, inspire you:
“Indeed, the allies of Allah – there will be no fear concerning them, nor
will they grieve. Those who have believed and were fearing Allah. For
them are good tidings in the worldly life and in the Hereafter. No change
is there in the words of Allah. That is what is the great attainment.”
Translated by Hamza Al Āthārī ,
ما هي أهم األهداف في حياة المسلمة؟
Dr. Lāylā Hāmdān, Māy 3, 2023, Ārticle, Consultātions; Women
The Most Important Goals In The Life of A Muslim Woman (PDF)